The 12 Startling Signs You’re a Sex Addict: It’s Not Fun Anymore

Is sex more of an issue for you than something you enjoy? It can happen. Figure out what’s happening, take a look at these signs you’re a sex addict.

Sex is a basic human need, it’s not always easy to see where the line is between enjoyment and addiction. If you’re thinking your feelings towards sex is turning into an addiction, it’s time to get the facts straight and see what’s really going on. Sex addiction is curable, but you first need to recognize the signs you’re a sex addict.

Of course, it’s going to be tough to read through them, but if you see yourself in any of these signs, be honest with yourself. It’s the only way to fight your sex addiction.

How to read the signs you’re a sex addict

Most people can confidently say they enjoy sex. They find it fun, relaxing, and arousing. In other words, they’re big fans of sex. On the other hand, too much of a good thing is bad as well. We never really think sex could be one of those things. Alas, sex has a dark side. [Read: The signs your high libido has become sexual addiction]

When do you know you’re a sex addict though? You cheated on your partner once, does that make you an addict? Or you were caught at work watching porn, does that make you an addict? It can be tricky to figure out whether your behavior is based on addiction, especially since you don’t want to admit it.

Some people know they’re sex addicts but don’t want to admit it. Once you admit it, you’re aware of your actions. If you’re not sure and want to find out, this can be a great first step in getting help. The signs you’re a sex addict are there, you just need to see them.

#1 Monogamy is almost impossible for you. You may like someone, really like them, but you’re still not able to be in a monogamous relationship. You find yourself cheating on them whether you really want to or not. You may genuinely want to be faithful with your partner, but you just can’t. You’re always seeking other sex partners, regardless of how good the sex is with your current partner. It’s never enough. [Read: Why do people in happy relationships still cheat?]

#2 Sex is the priority. You may work a regular job, have a spouse, and even kids, but sex is always number one for you. If you have to strongly decide whether to attend your best friend’s wedding or have sex with a prostitute, you, my friend, are probably a sex addict. Putting sex above everything is a strong sign something is wrong.

#3 You have sex with strangers and/or prostitutes. Now, I’m not saying having sex with strangers or prostitutes is a bad thing. Most of us have had a one-night stand or an encounter with an escort. Think of this though, are you constantly in need of sex with strangers? If so, you may be a sex addict. [Read: Signs you need sex therapy and how to learn to face it]

#4 You have to masturbate. We all masturbate, but you need to masturbate a couple, if not several times, a day. Sex addicts don’t always need to have sex with someone to feed the urge, they can also masturbate. If you’re masturbating several times a day and find yourself doing it because you have to, you may be a sex addict.

#5 You don’t think about the consequences. When you’re having sex with a complete stranger, you’re not thinking about the possible sexually transmitted infections you could contract *and spread* or how this will affect your relationship with your partner. You don’t care. The only thing that holds your focus is having sex and that’s it.

#6 You watch a lot of porn. Most of us have watched porn or watch porn on a daily or weekly basis. Porn can be used to sexually satisfy or enhance one’s sex life. For you, you can’t seem to live a day without it. See, addiction is measured by how long you can last without the substance. If you cannot go a day without watching porn, that’s a problem.

#7 Your kinkiness takes over. Listen, everyone has a kinky side, this isn’t something new. I do want you to ask yourself though, are you finding yourself needing to cater your life around your kink? If your kink has turned into your entire sex life, you need to talk to a professional. Though tying someone up may have been fun in the beginning, you walking them on a leash is a little much. [Read: How being sexualized can make or break you]

#8 You feel completely powerless. It’s like you’re Gollum from The Lord of the Rings. Your addiction to sex must be fed constantly. You don’t feel like you have control of your life, rather your sex addiction controls what you do, who you talk to, and how you make choices. You feel completely hopeless and aren’t sure what to do.

#9 You don’t have functioning relationships. The relationships around you are all messed up. Whatever relationship you’re in, you end up ruining by your actions. You get caught cheating, they find out you masturbate ten times a day, all these little things destroy your hopes in finding genuine love.

#10 You hate yourself. There’s no other way to say this lightly. After looking at what sex has done to your life, you start to hate yourself. You hate how you allowed it to take over, what it’s done to your life, and that you let it get this far.

#11 Your former partners have told you. If your past lovers have told you that you’re a sex addict, chances are, they’re right. They can provide an entirely different perspective into your life. If one person says you’re a sex addict, take it lightly. If two or three people are telling you this, look at why they’re coming to this conclusion. [Read: How to find a deeper connection in a relationship]

#12 You live a double life. You have two lives. One life is what you present to the people around you. Then, you have this dark side, this other life that only you know about. Of course, with time, people figure out what’s going on, but you work hard to keep these two lives at a distance from each other.

[Read: Steps you need to take to handle a sex addiction]

Do you see yourself doing any of these signs? If you think you exhibit the signs you’re a sex addict, talk to a professional. Get the help you need to enjoy your life again.

The post The 12 Startling Signs You’re a Sex Addict: It’s Not Fun Anymore is the original content of LovePanky - Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.

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