Do you know how to make yourself horny? It’s no good complaining you’re not always enjoying sex with your partner if you can’t do the leg work yourself!
So many of us get stuck into a mindset where we believe we need to find a partner who knows how to turn us on. Now, this isn’t wrong; you want to find someone who will arouse you and make you orgasm. But, you also want to know how to make yourself horny too.
How can this person turn you on when you don’t know what actually turns you on? See how this can become a problem?
[Read: 8 sneaky ways to know a girl’s feeling horny around you]
Why a little sexy alone time is never a bad idea
Do you regularly masturbate?
We know, personal question, right? The thing is, masturbation is the single best way to figure out how to make yourself horny.
You can learn what you like, what you don’t like, and how you like it. Then, when you’re with your partner, you can show them what gets you off, making your self life much more fulfilling.
The whole ‘masturbation will make you blind’ thing is so three centuries ago – not literally, but you get the idea. Nowadays we understand that masturbation is healthy and that it’s actually a fantastic way to reduce stress.
Feeling a little overwhelmed at work? Lock the door and get down to business – you won’t care about the deadline you’re facing after a little time on your own! [Read: 10 female masturbation tips for guaranteed orgasmic bliss]
If you’re still to be convinced, here are some of the proven benefits of masturbation.
1. You’ll get a better night’s sleep
2. Reduces stress
3. Helps you to chill yourself right out
4. Boosts confidence
5. Enhances positive body image
6. Helps to release sexual tension [Read: 20 strong signs of sexual tension to know you make each other horny]
7. May help to soothe muscle cramps and tension
8. Helps you to understand what feels good to you
It’s quite possible that you already enjoy a little “me” time already, and that’s great. If you don’t, it’s time you made it a priority. Learning how to make yourself horny could be the start of a new sexual revolution in your life!
How to make yourself horny
You want to be able to know your body and know how it reacts when your fingers are in a specific position or if you’re more likely to orgasm when the lights are on.
See, these are things that you need to discover on your own. [Read: Sexual arousal: 15 incredibly arousing ways to get and stay horny]
This is why finding out what makes you horny is so important. It will not only bring you to a place where you’re comfortable with yourself, but it will also help you be comfortable with your partner. Before anything, you need to know how to make yourself horny.
1. Take your time
You’re not trying to rush through this, there’s no point. What you want to do is allow yourself the time to explore freely. For many people, becoming aroused when you have someone in front of you is easy. However, it takes more work when you’re on your own.
If trying to arouse yourself is new to you, it will take time. Don’t rush – enjoy the process! [Read: 13 quick tips for instant horniness]
2. Create the right atmosphere
If you want to make yourself horny, then you need to put some effort into it. When you’re alone, create the ideal atmosphere that makes you feel comfortable and safe.
You want to feel like you’re able to do whatever you want while you’re making yourself horny.
Light some candles, put on some sexy music, wear clothing that makes you feel hot. Create a vibe that will allow you to lose yourself. Of course, it goes without saying that you should lock the door, turn your phone onto silent, and choose a time when you’re not going to be disturbed. [Read: 12 safe and natural ways to increase your libido]
3. Masturbate
Becoming aroused is one thing, masturbating is another thing. A little earlier we talked about the fact that masturbation is a great to learn what you like. Once you know that, you’ll have a range of go-to’s when you want to get in the mood. So, once you’ve worked on creating the scene and feeling sexual, try masturbating.
Most women are able to masturbate by focusing directly on the clitoris, but go with what feels good to you. Test out different strokes and the pressure. Once you find something that makes you feel good, stick with it and keep going. [Read: How to hump a pillow and the naughtiest ways to do it right]
4. Feel free to experiment
Listen, if you’re trying to make yourself horny, you need to experiment with your body. Don’t be afraid to use sex toys or anally stimulate yourself. These are all factors which can make you horny. The only thing is, you need to test it out for yourself.
One size doesn’t fit all when it comes to sexual arousal. Some people are turned on by the strangest things, and as long as that’s not hurting anyone and its not anything that crosses a red line, there’s no harm. [Read: 15 incredibly arousing ways to get and stay horny]
5. Use more than your hands
Yes, you have two hands, and you should be using them to make yourself horny. But, you also have sex toys which are available to you. Don’t be afraid to use a vibrator or a dildo. In fact, these toys can help you in discovering what can make you horny.
The great news is that it’s easier than ever before to purchase sex toys. You can easily go online and choose the toy you like. It will then be delivered to you in very discreetly.
Many are also very quiet too! You’ll find reviews on sex toy shopping websites, so you can find out what other people liked and didn’t like about any particular toy. [Read: Homemade dildos for when the moment strikes unexpectedly]
6. Focus on other areas than your vagina
Many people think that in order to make themselves horny, they just have to focus on their vagina or penis. Which isn’t completely wrong, but you have other areas which are erogenous zones. Grab your breasts, your ass, pull your hair, suck on your finger, use the rest of your body and find out which areas stimulate you.
Maybe you’re able to make yourself horny by just massaging your breasts. Perhaps you’re able to turn yourself on by stroking the inside of your wrist. Explore your body and be aware of your different erogenous zones.
7. Tease yourself
Everyone loves a good tease. Just before you’re about to climax, tease yourself by refraining from it. Yes, you heard right – stop yourself. It won’t be easy, but it will make your orgasm stronger.
Deny yourself the orgasm at least a couple of times before allowing the orgasm to wash over you. The more you tease yourself, the stronger your orgasm will be. This is a technique called Edging and it really works wonders for your sex life. [Read: What is Edging? How to use it orgasm harder and better than ever before]
8. Learn what makes you feel sexy
One part is learning about your body, the other part is to make yourself feel sexy. Wear clothing or lingerie that makes you feel sexy.
Style your hair, put some makeup on, allow yourself to look and feel amazing. Of course, you need to feel sexy if you want to arouse yourself. [Read: How to feel sexy and desirable all the time]
9. Take sexy photos of yourself
You don’t have to send these photos to anyone – these photos are for you. Set up the lighting and pose for the camera.
If you want, you can take these photos yourself or have your partner take them for you. Boudoir photos allow you to show off your sexual side. [Read: How to take good nudes – 36 tips for the sexiest nude selfies ever]
10. It’s all about the breathing
You’d be surprised at how important breathing is when you’re trying to make yourself horny. You can control your arousal and energy by practicing your breathing.
While masturbating, focus on your breathing and how it affects your body. While breathing, clench your PC muscle to increase pleasure. [Read: How to relax during sex: Free your mind and enjoy your orgasms]
11. Watch a hot movie
Of course, if you want, you can watch porn. But you can also watch a romantic or steamy movie which will also do an amazing job of turning you on.
Try watching movies such as “Showgirls” or “Wild Things,” you won’t regret it. But if you want to watch something that’s more direct with sex, then you can always opt for porn.
If you’re not into anything too graphic or it’s your first time in the porn realm, look for something with a romantic story. These days you can find porn made especially for women, and a huge range of different genres. Explore! [Read: The naughtiest borderline porn titles on Netflix]
12. Focus on relaxation
If you’ve tried these things and they’re not working, you need to relax. Of course, if you feel that you need to see a doctor, then, of course, you go see one and make sure everything’s okay. But perhaps you’re just overthinking things and need to take a step back and chill.
Many people are stressed out in this modern day and age, but that’s not going to help you learn how to make yourself horny.
It’s not possible to be aroused and ready for action when you’re thinking about everything you should have done that day. Chill out a little and learn to close the door on your worries for a short time.
13. Let your imagination fly
Men and women often find different things arousing. Of course, this is a huge generalization, but men tend to be turned on by what they see. Women are turned on by sights, sounds, feelings, possibilities. Lay back, close your eyes and let your imagination take over. Imagine the sexiest scene you can.
Maybe you’re being wooed by your favorite hot celebrity. What are they doing to you? How do they make you feel? It’s your journey so you can take this wherever you like; it can become as x-rated as you see fit!
Using your imagination is one of the best ways to learn how to make yourself horny. [Read: 30 sexy things to text your boyfriend to leave him craving for you]
14. Read erotica
Maybe watching porn or a hot film isn’t for you. Porn isn’t for everyone, that’s for sure, even with the huge range of genres you can find these days. It could be that reading a sexy scene hits the spot for you. That’s because it leaves enough space for you to picture the scene in your own mind – you’re using your imagination once more!
You’ll find erotica books very easily these days, but you can also head online and find short stories that might do it for you too. There is also x-rated fan fiction if you want to dream about your favorite celebrity again!
15. Do sounds do it for you?
Everyone finds different things to be a turn on or a turn off. How about sexy sounds? Yes, we’re talking about people getting it on. There is a reason porn stars make so much noise – because sex sounds are hugely arousing.
You can listen to sexy podcasts or you can search for audio clips online too. Perhaps the noises are enough to get your imagination where you need it to be. [Read: Sex sounds: How to moan and look & sound even more sexy in bed]
16. Try lube
Sometimes the direct approach works best. Lube makes everything hotter, slippery, and much sexier. When you’re masturbating, add in some lube and let your hands slide. You can also use massage oils over the rest of your body if you like, just be sure not to mix the two up!
17. Take a long, hot shower
The feel of the water on your skin can be extremely arousing if you’re in the right frame of mind. Take a shower but do so with the idea of arousal on your mind. You’ll notice that everything feels hotter and wetter. Use a sponge with your favorite shower gel and let it slide over your skin. Play a song that gets you in the mood.
Shower masturbation is pretty good fun in its own right – the shower head has a lot of potential! [Read: Slippery when wet: Make shower sex sizzle with these tips]
18. Do your own sexy striptease
Stripping for yourself might seem counterproductive but it’s got a lot of benefits! Firstly, it’ll help you to see how gorgeous you really are when you’re naked. And secondly, it’ll turn you on.
Dim the lights, put on some sexy music, set the vibe in the room and then stand in front of the mirror. Let your body move slowly to the music and go with it. Dance if you want to, but slowly remove each piece of clothing, teasing your own eyes with what’s to come.
19. Try sexting
This one might be a stretch for some, but sexting is a great way to get in the mood. When you’re away from your partner, try having a sexy texting session.
Be as explicit as you’re comfortable with and tell each other what you want to do the next time you see each other. You could even describe it in detail and let your hands wander. [Read: Sexting ideas: 14 sexy tips to effortlessly sext like a real pro]
20. Talk about your fantasies
This one takes a lot of trust in your partner but that’s something you should have anyway! Talking about your fantasies can get you really hot under the collar and when you’re done talking, maybe you could try acting out one of them?
Describe your fantasy in as much detail as possible but don’t touch yourself. Your partner can’t touch themselves either. By the end, you’ll be crazy with the horn!
21. Dance for yourself
Throw on your sexiest music, put on whatever makes you feel good and just go for it. Dance around you room like no-one’s watching *hopefully they’re not, so close the curtains*.
The very act of dancing is sensual, even if you’re not really dancing in a particularly sexy way. It’ll also get your blood pumping, which aids arousal.
22. Look for pleasure classes online
Yes, you can take a class in pleasure. The Internet is a wonderful thing! Look for a reputable online course and choose a subject that you want to know more about, or something which you feel is going to turn you on.
From massage to sex toys, relaxation to masturbation, there are classes for everything you can imagine. Boosting your sexual confidence is a turn on in itself! [Read: How to masturbate: 14 sexy self-pleasure tips for women]
23. Find pleasure through food
Food has appeared in many a sex scene throughout history and there’s a good reason for that. There are certain foods which are as sensual as they are delicious. It could be strawberries dipped in chocolate, or maybe it’s ice cream for you.
How about spaghetti slurped in a sexy way, or maybe a food that minds you of a previous hot encounter. Identify the food that gets you going and enjoy it. Be sure to eat slowly and mindfully, savoring every bit.
24. Write your own erotica
Earlier, we mentioned reading erotica, but what about writing your own? You don’t have to try and have it published, but hey, if you want to, go for it!
Writing is very creative and it allows you to tap into the depths of your imagination. You can write yourself into the story or you can use a character. Just let them do whatever you feel is going to get you hot. [Read: The top 50 kinky sex ideas worth trying at least once in your life]
25. Tell yourself that you’re horny
Sometimes our brains simply believe what we tell them, if we tell them enough.
When you’re dancing for yourself, tell yourself that you’re turned on. Maybe you’re eating, so tell yourself that you find it sexy. If you’re masturbating, tell yourself that you’re finding everything so arousing.
Often, the easiest options are the most effective!
[Read: Going solo: The 15 sexy benefits of masturbation]
Now that you know how to make yourself horny, take the time you need to learn about you and your body. Trust us, you need to know your body if you want someone else to turn you on.
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